How to Talk to Someone Who Is Depressed

It may just be me, but if you definitely don’t want me to cheer up, the best way to ensure that I won’t cheer up anytime soon is to tell me to cheer up.

It’s kind of an amazing piece of advice to give someone: “cheer up.” It’s like telling someone with a broken leg to hurt less. It does nothing to solve the underlying problem. It just suggests that the person experiencing the problem is wrong for exhibiting a symptom.

I’ve always been a depressive person. One time, in high school, a girl told me, “Smile! You always look like you’re dying! That’s why you don’t have any friends!”

I asked her, “Was telling me that supposed to cheer me up?”

She didn’t see the humor in it. Oddly, having a private laugh at her expense did cheer me up a bit.

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