How to Turn the Tables

The real Ric and I were talking about going to San Diego Comic Con a while back, and I considered throwing together a Knifeketeer costume for him. Then I remembered that you have to get any cosplay weapons inspected before you’re allowed out on the show floor every time you enter, and that would be a lot of knives to get checked.

Note from Missy: This one makes me want to play Hitman 3, because there are now “hobby knives” lying around for 47 to use.(Though I’ll probably go back to my classic habit of throwing wrenches at people’s heads.So satisfying!)

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How to Relate to Someone Whose Experience Contradicts Yours

This is completely unrelated to the comic, but the Beastie Boys song “Sabotage” is playing, and it occurred to me that if you’d told me in 2008 that eventually I would hear this song and think of Captain Kirk, I would not have believed it.

Also, you could have easily blown past-me’s mind by telling him that there would be a TV series about an elderly Captain Picard that also features Commander Data and Seven of Nine, and that it was quite good but many people were put off by “all the cursing.”

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How to Face a Difficult Task

I’ve been told that you can get pets to eat pills if you smear the pills with peanut butter. Of course, I wonder why they don’t just make tubes of medicinal peanut butter we can squeeze into our pets’ mouths, or children’s mouths, or, for that matter, my mouth. Why am I sitting here trying to figure out a way to make someone else’s medicine more pleasant when I don’t like taking the stuff either?

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How to Deal with a Family Crisis on the Other Side of the Country

A few years later, dad had heart surgery and didn’t tell any of us until afterward. We were not pleased, but now that the anger has subsided, I think I understand. He probably figured that if the surgery went well we’d all either be too happy to get mad or too worried about upsetting him in his delicate state to give him to hard a time. On the other hand, if the surgery went badly, telling us about it wouldn’t be his problem.

There’s a certain grim wisdom in that, which is the kind of wisdom my father specializes in.

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How to Enjoy the Wisdom That Comes with Age

There was some controversy about this one when it first ran, so let me be clear; I did not count Battlestar Galactica 1980 as a reboot . . . or a sequel . . . in fact, I like to pretend it didn’t happen. At that age I could live with Viper pilots riding around on flying motorcycles, but the Cylons coming to Earth to attack Wolfman Jack was too much for my child-mind to accept.

They’re still working on that third reboot, by the way. If it feels like it’s still too soon to you, I’ll point out that the Edward James Olmos/Mary McDonnell/Katee Sackhoff reboot premiered in 2003.

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How to Understand a Flaw in Our Society

(SPOILER ALERT FOR A MOVIE THAT IS OVER 20 YEARS OLD)

Also, the character from Fight Club that men chose to try to look like, Tyler Durden, was an unrealistic ideal in the movie. He started off as the imaginary representation of who the man Edward Norton’s character wanted to be.

When the film first came out, I knew a guy who talked about starting a real fight club. I told him I thought it was a good idea. I had no intention of going. I figured that knowing where all the guys who wanted to fight were meant that by avoiding that place I would be less likely to get attacked. Also, I wasn’t overly fond of the guy, and didn’t at all mind the idea of him getting pummeled.

Here’s a link to the article mentioned in the comic.

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How to Predict the Future

The fact that we assume the machines will want to kill us immediately just speaks to what a low opinion we humans have of ourselves.

“Someday the computers will become far more intelligent than we have ever been, or will ever be. Obviously the first thing any being that smart will want to do is kill us.”

I have a more positive outlook. I think there’s a very good chance they’ll want to keep us around, even if only as a sidekick species, or sort of like pets. No, that doesn’t sound great, but I said I said I had a “more positive outlook.” When you’re contrasting against the immediate murder of your entire species, that’s a pretty low bar.

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How to Make a Solemn Pact with a Good Friend

The thing that delights me so much about this comic now is that I’m so egotistical that I assume with all the other options open to him, Rick’s ghost would choose to haunt me.

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How to Fully Understand an Established Fictional Character

I enjoyed The Falcon and the Winter Soldier. I especially appreciated the bickering-brothers energy they gave Sam and Bucky. The only thing I would have added would be to have Bucky annoy Sam by always pronouncing Falcon as “Fall-con.”

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How to Tell Someone Things They Don't Want to Hear

Steve Jobs had a uniform. Reportedly, he had a closet full of one specific type of black turtleneck and one specific brand of jeans. People say he did it so that clothes would be one less decision he’d have to make every day.

I suspect part of the reason he chose to go the uniform route was that he realized that he was Steve Jobs. Everyone he ever met knew exactly who he was and already had an opinion of him. If people were impressed with him, they would continue to be impressed no matter what he wore. If, on the other hand, they weren’t impressed with him, no outfit was going to be cool enough to change that.

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