I worked in a place where almost everybody brought their lunch from home and ate it in the breakroom. One time, we had a potluck. I observed that the only thing that made the potluck different from a normal day was that we were sharing our food. That didn’t add to the festive mood.
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People don’t want to hear about the funny thing that happened in the bathroom. If you say, “The funniest thing just happened in the bathroom,” you can see how conflicted it makes them.
Alas, I can’t think of any funny bathroom stories at the moment. I suspect you’re more relieved than disappointed.
Note from Missy: So, Scott, you wouldn’t like me telling your readers about how one of our cats races to the bathroom with you every morning? And how she bites you on the butt, then curls up in your shorts? And that you refer to it as “daddy-daughter time”? Noted.
Note from Scott: Yes, I would hate it if you told them that.
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I do tend to use a lot of TV and movie quotes in conversation. Even more commonly, I’ll compare whatever I’m talking about to things I remember from TV shows or movies. In the animated Transformers movie, there were these Transformers called Junkions, that could only communicate through copied snippets of TV and radio broadcasts. I’m a lot like them.
It’s not often that you see an explanation that is an example of the very thing it’s explaining.
But what am I doing? I didn’t write this comic, Missy did. We should see if she has any comment.
Missy’s comments: What I find most fascinating is how everything in this strip is still true, 8 years later. Tim Gunn is still rocking Project Runway with high-value words. Shopping at Costco is still a crowded nightmare. Scott still speaks in TV and movie quotes on the regular, and he’s still regularly dying in video games. :)
I do remember when this first ran, readers took issue with the “Alcoholic or not” in the first panel narration, and thought I meant that only alcoholic people played drinking games. (When what I meant was that the drinks could be alcoholic in nature, or not.) It made me have even more respect for how much tight editing Scott always had to do to get stuff to fit in these tiny panels.
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In panel one of this comic, I give people the creeps.
In panel two, I’m rude to a customer.
In panel three, I’m a terrible employee.
In panel four, I brag about all of it to my wife.
This comic is either indicative of a self-esteem issue, or it shows how well I hide my awful impulses. Neither of those is a good thing.
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I should probably talk to a lawyer to see if I can squeeze a few bucks out of PBS for my new show idea, Tales from the Royal Bedchamber.
Nah. It’s PBS. I’ll just consider my idea to be a pledge. They don’t even have to mail me a tote bag.
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Once, long, long ago when I was in high school, I was riding in my older brother’s car when it broke down miles from the nearest town. He didn’t seem surprised, as he knew the water pump was going bad.
I asked him why he hadn’t replaced it before he drove us out, miles from the nearest town. A reasonable question, I think.
He explained that he tried to, but that the replacement water pump he bought didn’t fit because it had an extra water filter built in that interfered with part of the suspension. This was a fine example of a reply that answered the question without addressing the underlying issue.
Anyway, he took the new water pump, which still didn’t fit but which he had not yet returned to the auto parts store, and pounded on it with a hammer until it did fit. Of course, it also leaked like a lawn sprinkler. So, he coated the pump with a thick layer of shoe goo.
We laugh, but it got us home and didn’t leak a drop!
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In the time since I made this comic, shark week has expanded. One can now find shark-related programming on other channels during Shark Week, including episodes of Shark Tank.
I wouldn’t mind seeing what would happen if the producers released a live sea lion into the Shark Tank. I’m betting O’Leary would offer it a royalty deal.
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This won’t seem related, but the comic reminded me of it.
I have a friend who I met when we both worked in the theme park industry. I have accompanied him while walking in dark, spooky locations. I’ve stood next to him on catwalks looking down over great heights. I’ve sat next to him on multiple thrill rides, under various unusual conditions (lights on when it’s supposed to be a dark ride, lights out when there’s supposed to be light, that sort of thing) on many occasions. The most scared I have ever seen him look was the chair-lift-dance at his Jewish wedding ceremony.
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